Over £4m a goal – Defoe’s a bit dear!


Jermain Defoe - Header

I got loads of abuse for saying before the season started that Peter Crouch’s goals had cost his various clubs over 300K each. But what about the price of JD?

After signing from Portsmouth for 14M, Jermaine’s three so far have cost us over 4M each. What a bargain! He says that hard work in the gym while he was injured has paid off, making him stronger than he’s ever been. Stronger and more confident. Harry thinks the same and he’s known him since he was 17. Every club in the Prem, top four included would kill to get hold of him right now. Especially old Purple Nose at Old Trafford who was settling back, congratulating himself on snapping up Michael Owen for nothing. When you pay nothing, you get nothing as Harry might say, especially when chatting to the Chairman.

You do get the feeling with Crouch, Keane and Pav all scrambling to get into the side alongside Defoe that there’s more come. Probably this weekend if you follow the rule about players returning to clubs, and the last time I looked the Spammers only had one decent defender at the back. Not enough!

I liked that Celtic chant to the Arse, “We’ve got more Englishmen than you.” They had one, Wenger had none, and quite possibly that’s the way he likes it. We have plenty and it’s important to include the spirit of the English game alongside international flair. Harry wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Just to clear up the maths problems, I am only talking about transfer fees, not including wages, and only this season! That’s how you get the over 4M figure.

If the professors want to do a different sum and prove how wrong I am – be my guest. Comment is free.

By Phil Rowson

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  1. I’m no proffesor, but even I’ve worked out that you’re a plank. Why not be even more stupid and cost it out on league goals he’s scored on a Wednesday this season, 2, which makes him even dearer at £7 million per goal. Alternatively we could do it the right way and cost it based on the goals he’sscored since he returned, £14 million divided by 9, a little over £1.5 million and dropping. If you’re gonna talk boll*cks fella, don’t embarrass yourself by doing it on the net.

  2. The only true way to work out the cost per goal is to take the initial transfer fee, plus any add-ons that apply, add accrue wages, subtract the fee received if the player has since been sold, then divide by the amount of goals, then subtract any goal-related bonuses in the players contract. As most of these figures are not made public you cannot possibly work out a player’s cost per goal. Although your technique of taking the transfer fee divided by the amount of goals and rounding down is of course equally adequate when backed up with such a well written article. To summarise; your article is shit.

  3. crap article, irene you are correct as defoe is 10 times better than the jumped up brazilian, prem league record transfer my arse! would rather pay that for owen!! defoe for golden boot and possibly top 4 either way we will be above man city as always.

  4. Don’t care if your math sucks but you’ve made your point.

    YES! JD is flying high at the moment and I really believe that he’ll score more than 20 this season possibly 25-30 goals! That is golden boot territory!

    Good luck JD

  5. If you insist on doing these silly sums then why are you only counting this sesason?

    It’s like saying there’s only 100,000 unemployed because we’re not counting anyone outside of Nottingham!

    It doesn’t make any sense.

  6. what trash article!

    defoe is on fire and will finish on 20plus gls this season. 14m is a bargain for a 20goal man

    if ronaldos only scored 1 for madrid does that mean 80m per goal? hes an awful player

    dont get this article. was it written like this for a reaction?

    spurs top4 this season, liverpool drop out

  7. Well at least he represents better value than Cristiano Ronaldo, who has cost Real Madrid 80 million pounds and hasn’t even scored, let alone played a match.

    Perry Groves meanwhile cost Arsenal just 75,000 pounds and scored 21 goals in return (albeit over a period of 6 years). As a result the cost of Groves was 3,571 pounds per goal.

    Pele meanwhile cost nothing and scored something in the region of 1,000 goals. That’s a staggering 0 pounds per thousand goals.

    Thus the dream partnership is clearly Pele and Groves. Why we don’t sign these two is quite beyond me.

    And don’t forget 99% of statistics are made up.

  8. whatever Defoe cost, it was better value than the bandwidth spent to host this article. and whatever abuse you got over Crouch, clearly it wasn’t enough.

  9. English game? ‘Arry says: “Our role models are Barcelona (!)” Now that’s interesting. I watched Barca on telly last night. They kept getting the ball to Lennon, sorry Messi, who got a couple of goals, and Modric, sorry Henri was very influential on their left. ‘Arry’s remark makes a lot of sense. I know we were very impressed with playing them in the Wembley Cup.

  10. Oh dear I think a certain website needed a few hits, here’s an idea, write a completely pointless article and anger people for comments…it might be worth working his ratio out when he leaves, your maths means that so far Real Madrid have paid £80m per Ronaldo goal. How do these articles get published?

  11. In answer to Glory Glory Spur, clearly yes. But the response per article is getting better, and cost per comment greatly improved.

  12. I love the abuse this guy is getting, for what is clear to everyone as a load of rubbish. I particularly like Paul Jackson’s comments – great work.

    Using the divine logic this article, may I ask how many saves has Gomes cost us in GBP?
    How would you work out the cost how many goals Bassong has prevented?!

  13. if jd signs a four year contract at 16 million (for example) then he costs 4 million a season ,what is he only gonner score one goal a season for the next four years dumb arse , what a tit

  14. I really do not care how much a goal cost us
    He a yid and he is scoring goals for spurs and
    England .We are top of the league how long for i
    Do not know but at the end of the season if we are top
    Or any where near it i am happy fellow and i do not care
    Whhat that red shit manure supporters says they talk out
    of there Arse anyway


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